Passion Unleashed

"I'd rather you hate me than be indifferent about me - at least there's passion in that".

I said those very words to someone 2 days ago.  And I meant every word.  It doesn't matter to me what that person does with those words.  What matters is what I do with them.  Perhaps hate is a strong word - but it's also a strong feeling.  The same is true of love.

I have tried indifference.  It works well for some people in my lives but for others it's simply impossible.  I can't help the passion that runs through my veins when I feel something intensely about someone.  However, I can channel that passion into something good.  Someone I'm extremely passionate about has hurt me and continues to try to hurt me.  The relationship between us is over and I know it's for the best.

However, I haven't known what to do with all that leftover passion.  I can't simply transfer it to another person - my heart doesn't work that way.  So I have chosen the only other thing I know to do..... unleash it!  I'm letting it go - letting it flow freely - and letting it be channeled at the one it was intended for.  I'm doing this with no cap or filter until I have nothing left.  I have been building walls, trying to hold it in - but that isn't working....  instead it is smothering me.  If I keep it in, it may very well kill me and I'm not about to let that happen.

So....  I'm letting out this reserved love and letting it flow freely into the air. When it is gone, there will be no more but it will be replaced with something new, something healthy, something real.