Love and War

My week has had two very vivid themes going: Anger and Love.  Nary the two should mix, right?  However..... I'm learning that the two emotions are very similar and actually feed off one another in many ways.  Thing is, if you let one overpower the other - there will be a death.  If you choose to feed the anger, love will die.  BUT if you choose to feed the love, the anger will die!  If you linger in the state of balancing the two - feeding them both - keeping them strong - they become toxic to your system and eventually YOU will die.

I'm really beginning to understand how the concept of being luke warm angers God.  When we are luke warm, we have no passion.  Passion feeds action!  Anger and love are both passions of the heart.  Anger can be healthy to a degree but if we let it fester, it becomes the root of bitterness and resentment.  Love however, is never unhealthy - not ever!  Love is the purest, most powerful weapon we have against many ailments of the heart.

I'm not just talking about love - the emotion.  The noun form of the word is the sappy, love story aspect of it. It's all nice and good, but it often isn't real.  The only way love is real is if it becomes a conscious, intentional effort.  The world gets us all wrapped up in the emotion of love, but often glazes over the importance of the verb form.....  the ACTION of LOVE.

We may think love comes easy to us.  I often say "I love LOVE"....  and I do - but what I'm referring to there are sappy love stories and love songs and the feeling of being in love.  That does come easy - who doesn't want to feel the love?!?

But how many of us are really ready to give love?   You may think you have love to give - but that's only when thinking about the feeling aspect of it.  How easy is it it love someone when part of you really just wants to hate them?  How easy is it to love someone when all you are feeling from them is indifference?  How easy is it to love someone when you feel that they no longer love you back?

Well - I, my friends, can tell you from experience that it's the hardest thing I've ever tried to do.  But because God says to love.....  I am going to do what He says.  Because God said I can fix this problem for you but I need your help - then I will love.  One of His greatest commandments is love....  not to feel the love but to GIVE the love.  Will my love be returned?  I have no idea.  That is beside the point.  I know that if I do what God says, He will fix this pattern of limbo I've been in.  He will bring me out of the desert and into His promised land if I will put a conscious effort and true focus into loving my person.

It is a battle....  there are weapons of self doubt being thrown from every direction.  I battle my own will at times.  I battle worldly influences - both influences to myself and influences to one I love.  But I know I'm worth it and more importantly, I know he's worth it.  So my praying peeps, if you believe in love the verb - pray me through this.  You are part of my armor, along with faith, hope, and scripture.  I am fighting to the death....  the death of anger, bitterness and resentment so that only three remain - faith, hope and love.