Grounded

I'm afraid I've been grounded. Perhaps this is a punishment of sorts - not that I've been out of line necessarily but that I've been needing time to retreat and find my perspective. I've tried to write a few times but it seems that my blogs have lacked a certain flow or rhythm so I have not posted any of them. I've had too much on my mind and I think that shows when I sit down to write. I can't categorize my thoughts into a logical essay.

My sanity has been saved by random Bible verses that come my way. Today I received the following:

“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening — it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” Hebrews 12:11 (NLT)


I'm still in the midst of the disciplinary process. It's not as painful as it was when it started and things are beginning to level out, but yet there is still an occasional sting and agonizing ache present on random occasions. I would imagine that it is much like losing a limb. I've been told that when you lose an arm or leg, you can still feel it in a way - phantom sensation or phantom pain. I'm not sure how long this lasts, but I guess eventually you either get used to it or quit feeling it.

The verse above gives me quite a bit of hope. For the last few months, I've been craving peace. The script above promises that. Some day I will be at peace with this particular circumstance I'm dealing with now. Some day, I will be stronger because of it. Some day, perhaps, I can help someone else through it.

When I discipline my own children or force a "time out" upon them, it is to shape them, mold them or make them think about what is best. I remove distraction from them so that all they have is their thoughts. I never see this grounding period as a very lengthy time, but from their perspective it may seem like forever. I am now in their shoes - this grounding period is taking much longer than I feel I want or need it to. But - I guess you can't hurry healing. It happens on its own time and I just need to realize that I am under God's protection while it ensues.

He is trying to give me a peaceful harvest. It is up to me to be patient and .... "Be still and know that He is God."

Remote Control

I have written about my inner control freak on many occasions but because I'm working on evicting that part of my personality I came to a very poignant revelation. God is most definitely a man.

Why?

Just as every man must have possession of the remote control, so must God.

And silly me, I've been trying to wrestle Him for it! Thing is, I really don't even need or want the remote. He has enabled me to get up and change the channel myself if I really want to BUT he also can change it back as soon as I sit down. God's will is done whether we like it or not. He can turn up the volume, change our channel and even program our DVR.

I am here for His viewing pleasure and at any point in time, if my programming does not please Him - He may decide to channel surf for awhile. Good thing His remote allows for viewing of all our stations. I know He wouldn't want to miss even one episode of our daily soap opera lives.

I don't need the remote control. I only want to watch God's network. I want His programming to be mirrored in me - to be God's sister station. So I'm handing the remote back to Him and letting Him choose the volume, the channel and even what gets put on my DVR.