Tears from Heaven

Just as rain and snow descend from the skies
and don't go back until they've watered the earth,
Doing their work of making things grow and blossom,
producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry,
So will the words that come out of my mouth
not come back empty-handed.
They'll do the work I sent them to do,
they'll complete the assignment I gave them. (Isaiah 55:10-11)

Last summer I had two flower pots by my front door filled with the most beautiful, vibrant red geraniums. They were dutifully watered and cared for but still began to wilt and lose color. Upon further inspection I began to realize the pots did not have holes so the water could leak out. I loved the pots and did not want to have to replant the flowers so holes were drilled into the bottom so the excess could drain away. It was only a few days before the flowers perked up and regained their vibrant hue once more.

After thinking about this and reading the scripture above, I have begun to realize that I was filling up with water and had no holes for far too long. God loves the vessel that is me and has a purpose for me right where I am. He saw me wilting and losing my color, so I think he placed this huge hole in my heart so that the excess fluid would drain away. That is where I am now. I don't think I have ever cried as much as I have the last few weeks of my life. I'm still in the draining process. My tears are to my soul as the rain from heaven is to the earth. My tears are helping me grow and blossom, producing seeds of experience providing the food of wisdom for those I may interact with in the future. Just as God has a purpose for the rain, He has a purpose for these tears.

I long to have the full, rich, vibrant blooms of a healthy flower. So for now, I will embrace these tears and trust God to drain the unhealthy buildup out of my heart.