Writing - healthy habit or unnecessary evil?

I continue to let this go - this writing that I used to be so passionate about.  It was a form of therapy to me at one time; an outlet for undefined emotion - a way to work out my thoughts and give words to my feelings.

What I've noticed since I quit writing regularly is that I find it increasingly difficult to communicate effectively.  I was very in tune with my thoughts and feelings two years ago and I now have a hard time   processing emotion.  The only blame I can put to that is that I no longer have time to stop and just *feel*.  It's go, go, go which makes time for writing a luxury for which I have no budget.  Sometimes sleep is just more important than thought…….

Or is it?  What causes sleep to take precedence over other healthy habits?  Depression, health issues, or just pure avoidance?  Am I afraid of what I might encounter if I just sit down to process it a bit?  Am I just so stubborn that I don't want to confront the negative feelings that might be surfacing?

Possibly it has nothing to do with anything negative at all.  When I quit writing, it was when I was incredibly happy.  My best blogging took place when I was unhappy and when life began happening the way I wanted, it was all too easy to quit writing.  Who wants to hear about pure bliss anyway?

But why must I limit myself?  Lent is upon us and we will be doing an interesting study at church throughout the season.  The study provides journaling/blogging opportunities and I'm kind of excited about that.  I want to make time for this again.  Instead of giving something up, I'll be adding this in.  Adding something has always worked better for me than giving something up.

So - let's see.  I'm going to be blogging away, but I'm not sure how personal this will get.  I'm still very cautious what I put out there for all the world to see.  Some of it I will post, some of it I won't.  But I will be back in the game - the game of knowing who I am, what I feel and how to process all that.

Life is rough.  Might as well leave a record of our struggles.  At the very least, someone somewhere will know they are not alone by reading a blog that some random individual was bold enough to put out there.  For now, it's late and the need for sleep is trumping my need to vent, or think, or process.