What girl doesn't grow up listening to fairy tales and wondering if some day her prince will come? How many women grew up and believed they found their prince only to discover he was a frog in disguise? Perhaps those same women even knew in their heads that "Happily Ever After" was only for fairy tales but still had hope or expectation that it could exist in reality. Why in the world do so many of us still long for that fairy tale ending and is it possibly obtainable?
I dismissed the idea of a "Happily Ever After" quite some time ago. For a long while, I just tried to accept it and enjoy the things I had been blessed with anyway. However - something in my soul longed for more. The longing nagged at me long enough until I found the courage to make some pretty excruciating life changes. Through this time, I learned many valuable lessons and began to feel a peace I had not known. I attribute this to spiritual growth and appreciation for my place in life - an acceptance of all my circumstances - good and bad - with the belief that even the bad things had molded me into the person God wants me to be. I truly believe His will is done whether we comply with it or not. If I refuse to let Him use me, He will still accomplish what He desires. I am insignificant in that respect....... However, he WANTS to use me. He pursues ME. And He longs for ME! He is complete - with or without me.
I also began to see that because I have an intimate relationship with God that I am complete. No longer am I half the woman or invisible or insignificant or secondary to anything or anyone. Those are feelings that have past. I may not be perfect, thank goodness for that - but I am who God made me and He made me this way for reasons unknown but reasons that will be revealed on an as needed basis. Even my flaws can be used for His good and even if I never know how.
So then what happens when one finally gets to her place of Utopia? What happens when contentment sets in and complacency is abolished? Just when life is good - life gets better. Is it possible that when we finally quit asking and learn to appreciate all we have that God decides to bless us even more?
I am in a state of disbelief at this point - awestruck at what has been given to me and at the same time fearful that it is not real or that it is temporary. Feeling painfully inadequate in relation to this gift and humbled by the responsibility that comes with it. What God has entrusted to me is precious and must be protected but at the same time I'm bursting with excitement and desire to share it! But.... there are no words. No way to describe it. No method to demonstrate it. No pictures to portray it. Yet, there is hope. Hope I haven't known in a long time. Belief that I never knew could be restored. Passion that I had no idea could be ignited.
So I'm beginning to re-think the so called myth of "Happily Ever After" even if I'm still a realist at heart. Contentment is a good starting point but I think that perhaps God chooses go beyond what we find fulfilling and give us even more. We all have the things we dream about but He has ways to enhance those dreams. Life can be even better than our dreams and I think that is becoming my new reality.
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